Alicia

Alicia, Harmony, Alannah and I in June 2019

You Are.../I am...

A song whose melody is light—

the best there is—singing

with outstretched hands, my love

inspired by the sparks of joy

reach out and take my hand

I wasted precious time, forgetting

of you in my arms, my house, then

wandering, looking for something I lost

sleep—those nights drowned in red

darker than blood wine, the secret

fear that I wouldn’t find the thing—

if there was a thing—that kept you from me

I once held expectations, now only hope—

broken and glued-together hope,

for the reasons mothers understand—with

my hands. I named you 

seeking truth, the gold you might find in

everything.  My girl, always shining,

as you lift your arms to be carried, lifting

away from tender wounds, look

for your heart, unveiled. Look

this way, see me reaching now

by the mercy of God, to bring you back

to me—a mother who loves you

This poem is for my daughter, Alicia, a woman in constant motion, who turns thirty-one today! If you read it line-by line from the top down, it is about Alicia and my constant search to understand her as she grew. If you read it, line-by-line, from the bottom to the top, it is about me seeking understanding for today--to love her for the woman she is.  

All by the grace of God--all by the grace of God...