Lauren tries on my glasses Thank you to Hannah Joy Photography |
Our son David and his wife Lennae have
three girls in their family: Laila, Lilli and Lauren. When people ask me what they're like, I sometimes say that they remind me of the girls in Despicable Me, the animated movie about
an over-sized Eastern-European super- villain who has his heart melted by three
orphans. The girls, Margo, Edith and
Agnes are sisters, but all have different personalities Margo, (like Laila) is the eldest is parental,
protective and precocious; Edith (Lilli) seeks danger and adventure in her everyday
life; and Agnes (Lauren), the youngest, is a shining example of all that is magical with
childhood.
There is something special about the baby of a family. They are well-protected and learn confidence from family. Lauren is trusting, hopeful, and
filled with gigantic expectations of life.
Since she is the baby of the family, all of the love trickles down to her
and she is consequently very loving herself.
The last time I visited them, Lauren and I had a game: passing a simple
ball back and forth to one another without dropping it (we ended up getting
very close to 200). The simplicity of
the game did not throw off Lauren, who was always thinking of how we could
improve our record. We must have tried
this game six or seven times before I left.
I was so happy that she wanted to play with me – something I could
actually do.
David and Lilli hold Lauren, only two days old. |
Lauren turns seven today.
I still remember the day she was born – at home
in a hot tub (my daughter in law had all her babies in the tub). David and Lennae had two small girls already
and I openly wondered about the addition of that third child. Most young mothers can tell you that the
third child is officially juggling . I
worried that the kids (David and Lennae) might be overwhelmed… with so much
work. There was little I could offer to
help –we were living in South Africa.
We were living in Johannesburg when Lauren
was born; she changed everything. We had
said goodbye to our family and moved halfway across the world. I wasn’t sure how to process the birth of one
of our granddaughters from such a distance.
Getting the pictures via email filled me with admiration, love and
emptiness. I wanted to be there to at
least hold her, but it was near to impossible.
By the time we moved back Lauren was four
years old and she barely knew us. Grateful
for her parents, who built toward us, we began the business of reconnecting. Only one problem – we lived in Cali and the
kids lived in Kansas. We visited Kansas and
spent good, purposeful time “giving the kids their rest” and selfishly kidnapping
the girls to take them to fun places that we could remember later as shared experiences. Whenever we are together, Lauren wants to
listen to my stories – she tells me some of her own. She loves play of any kind and always invites
me to be part of her world – a sparkling, glittery wonderland.
Last visit she asked me if I wanted to tape
her as she did “her funny dance”. Of
course I agreed and got my camera ready – she danced, like a whirling wind sock
arms flailing toward the sky, knees
bouncing toward her chin. I watched it,
just today and remembered her beautiful, young joy.
There is a line from Dispicable Me, where
Gru is putting the girls to bed and Agnes says something adorable. He looks at her, sadly and says “Never grow
up, Agnes.” It is a temptation of a
parent to not want the baby of the family to grow up. It is even a greater temptation for the
grandparent – to wish that the treasured child would stay golden forever. As with letting go such futile wishes, I have learned how to be a long-distance
Abuela. So much of the experience is
built on prayer – and I pray constantly for my grandchildren.
Happy Birthday, Lauren. As you do grow up, may you take all of this
family love with you and bless the world as you have blessed our lives. You are the sparkles in the air, young
lady.
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